Baseball mindfulness

It took moving to England to make me really appreciate baseball.  Oddly, it's a bigger part of my life now than it ever was before.  I watch nearly every Pirates game, and that wasn't even true during the Van Slyke years.  MLB.tv makes it simple to stream every game, so my morning routine has been watching the previous night's game over my coffee.  Before school was out, I could get through 4 innings and finish over dinner.  During the summer, I just watch it all the way through.  And every Sunday I have a game I can watch live.  It's been awesome.  It makes me feel like I'm still a part of Pittsburgh even as I start to lay down roots in London.

<sidenote> The Pirates would be smart to trade Starling Marte.  He is a lazy player.  They were smart to pick up Sean Rodriguez again.  He works his butt off. </sidenote>

I also play softball now.  I'd never played on an organized baseball or softball team before I lived in England.  I've played for three years now in London.  Between the two teams I play for during the week and all the weekend tournaments we enter, I play a lot.  I'm discovering that baseball/softball really teaches me to calm down.  I'm more competitive than I like to let on, and I get really pissed at myself when I don't perform.  Picture Rain Man smacking himself in the head.  That's not far from the truth.  I now realize I've normally avoided competitive situations sort of subconsciously because I don't like that side of myself.  But I love baseball, so I've finally had to face it head on.  If I think about the hit I need to get, I pop it up.  If I think about the catch I need to make, I drop it.  If I think about the throw I need to make, I sail it.  It's weird and counter-intuitive to me, but I only play well when find a way to not think about it.  Yesterday, down by two in the bottom of the last inning, one out. I'd flown out and popped out the first two times at bat.  A year ago, I'd have popped out again.  This time, I managed to talk myself into calming down.  "Watch the first pitch no matter what.  Wait for a good one, you'll know when you see it.  Watch the ball all the way.  Snap the wrists."  I got a double that started a winning rally.  Two days ago, I'm playing 3rd base in a close game.  Runner on 1st.  Batter singles, runner rounds second heading for 3rd.  "Maybe he gets here.  Don't worry.  Walk over to the bag.  Make a big target for the relay.  Watch the ball into the glove, then straight down and hold."  Got the runner out.  Snuffed a possible rally.  Softball is forcing me to calm down and focus.  

Even when it doesn't end well, which it often doesn't, the game is forcing me to find a way to deal with it calmly.  I'm at shortstop and a perfect double play ball comes to me.  I tag 2nd, throw to first, and the throw sails 10 feet above her head.  "You got one.  The force is still on.  Next time, slow down, eye contact, throw hard again."  The next grounder comes to me, the runner beats the throw.  "Runner was just too fast.  Take a step in to shorten the next throw."  Softball is forcing me to productively deal with failure. 

I have no choice, really.  I can't keep breaking my helmet throwing it on the ground.  

Baseball's best hitters fail 2/3 of the time.  Baseball's best teams lose more than a third of their games.  Harvey Haddix pitched 12 perfect innings and still lost the game.  And for 25 years, ESPN has been reminding me about Sid Bream and Francisco Cabrera.  Baseball teaches you to deal with defeat.