The dreaded national exams

Back in the USA, some of my old students are finishing up senior year, saying good bye to everyone.  Some are headed to Disney World.  Many have known what college they'll attend for quite a while now, and the time has between college acceptance has been an exercise in trying to remain motivated for anything except the AP exams.  Those AP exams wouldn't be the first they'd ever taken, usually, and they wouldn't change their university acceptance at this point.  There are final exams for the school, too, but let's not kid ourselves into thinking the seniors really care that much about those.

Here in the UK, my students are going insane over exams.  And exams really have consequences.  These exams are nationally recognized and required.  They are, essentially, what all this schooling has been leading up to.  They emphasize the main difference between UK and USA schools.

For readers in the USA, here is a crash course what these exams mean for kids here.  For readers in the UK, you can correct me if I am wrong, as I am still learning.  I teach two levels of physics, GCSE and A-level.  Let's start with GCSE.  It covers Years 9 through 11, which corresponds to grades 8-10 in the USA (they call kindergarten "year 1" which is why the numbers are all one higher).  They learn physics over the span of three years, along with all their other subjects.  The school organizes mock exams each year to give them an idea how they are doing and to predict their likely grade when they finally take the exam.  In the month of May of Year 11, they sit down to take 20+ exams over the span of a couple weeks.  They have to review for that many subjects, reaching back over three years of material! Honestly, these kids amaze me.  They are champs, giving up basically every waking moment to reviewing (they say "revising").  They get one shot, so they really hope they don't get sick or something.  I am sure there is some system for dealing with emergencies, but the kids certainly don't plan on having any more than one shot.  The grades they get determine far more than any tests our 15- and 16-year olds take. Job applications ask about your GCSE scores.  In the USA, we say "I graduated with a 3.56 GPA!" or "Hey, I graduated!"  In the UK, they say the number of GCSE's they passed and/or how many A's and A*'s they got.

Then comes decision time.  They can be done with schooling if they like and just get a job (although I think this is changing), or they can apply to colleges to continue studying something.  College, or sixth form, to UK kids means basically junior and senior year of high school back in the USA, Years 12 and 13.  This is where they will be studying something at A-level.  They apply to colleges all around, not necessarily the one connected to the school they've been attending.  GCSE grades determine where they can go and what they can study.  Yes, they have to narrow down their subject choices.  They can study 4 subjects, or sometimes 5 maximum.  The subjects they choose will determine what they can study at the university level, so they must choose wisely.  This is a decision made at 15 or 16, and it determines what they can even hope to study at a university.  I don't know how many of you are doing something now that you thought you might be doing when you were 15, but I have a feeling the percentage is not high.  I met one man that took Maths, Further Maths, Physics, and Chemistry because he liked Mathematics and figured these prepared him well.  When he went into a university physics program, he realized that the mathematics that inspired him more was economics and banking.  In the USA, this would not be a problem.  Just change majors.  In the UK, he had to drop out, go back to sixth form to take new A-levels, and reapply to university programs.  So this is not small thing.

A-levels actually involve exams each year, AS after Year 12 and A2 after year 13.  After getting their AS results in August, they figure out if they have the grades to remain in sixth form.  Even so, they'll generally drop one subject for Year 13.  They start applying to universities at the beginning of Year 13, and they even get conditional acceptance offers, but they don't really know if they're in until they get their scores in August. Yes, August. They don't actually know if they got into the university until a couple weeks before classes begin.  If they didn't end up getting the necessary scores, there's a mad rush to find programs for which they qualify.

So, for good and/or ill, exams really mean something in the UK.  Students are measured by them.  Schools are rated by them.  Right now, everyone is freaking out about them.

Dealing with Governments

I have had two big adventures in government policy in the past couple months.  Now that I know you're glued to the screen, let's explore them.

My USA taxes

Okay, no one likes paying taxes.  I'm not going to go off on a rant about the IRS. In fact, I think they're a perfectly fine organization.  There, I said it.  We all need to pay our taxes.  And up until now, it has been quite an easy thing to do.  I'm single, I have no dependents, I own no real estate, and I have no major stock investments.  I am as easy as it gets tax wise.  Just jump on TurboTax, punch in numbers, click "no" a bunch of times, and I'm done.  I get no big tax breaks, but I have an easy return.  And then I moved to England.  

TurboTax still works.  This is a good thing.  But when I moved overseas, I made the government paranoid that I was a super rich person trying to hide my billions in tax shelters.  So, I have to report my income that I made in the UK working for a UK school, on which I already pay UK taxes.  Well, the USA says I have to pay USA taxes on this, unless I have been living in the UK for a year.  Keep in mind, the tax year only lasts a year.  So, obviously I have not lived here for a full year.  But, I can apply for an exemption once I have.  I might not get it, in which case I will owe all those unpaid taxes on the income I am already taxed on over here, which will suck.  Either way, I have to wait until June to take that step.  I got an extension, so all is good there.  It seems very complicated, so I decided to call a few tax accountants that work with USA tax returns.  They all seem to offer their personal tax return service for around 700 pounds, to start.  That's a personal return, not a business return.  So, that's not going to happen.  I'll just have to wait until June to see if I can convince the USA government that I am not hiding untold billions from them.  

My UK Visa

I got my visa last year because King's Ely sponsored me.  Now I am changing employers, and I need to change sponsors.  So I go to the UK governments website, look up the rules for my "Tier 2" visa, and go to the section that talks about changing employers.  It says, no problem, just fill out a "Change of Employer" form.  Sounds easy.  "You can do it online."  Awesome, I like online.  "The online system is down due to maintenance.  Please fill out the paper form."  Crap.  I'll just wait a couple weeks.  Still down.  I call and ask. Apparently the online system hasn't worked in a year.  Well then, I guess it's paper for me.  So I download the form.  It's a 64 page document that is a full application for a new visa.  Let me be clear, there is no "Change of Employer" written anywhere on this form. So, I call the help line.  They tell me that there is no such form, and that I have to apply for a brand new visa.  This includes paying the 428 pound fee, plus pay 20 pounds to get my fingerprints taken again, even though they already have them.  I am not quite happy about this.  I ask why the website clearly refers to a form that does not exist.  This blows my help desk operator's mind.  So, I hang up, yell something, throw a piece of paper at my door, pick said paper and put it in the trash, and start filling out the form.  I come to the part saying I have to give them my passport and wait two months for processing.  I already have international trips booked, so I am not in favor of this.  So, I look at the website for another option, and they say I can do this thing in person instead of mailing away.  It just costs 400 pounds more.  Yep, double the fee.  So, I can schlep my ass all the way to them, but I have to pay double the fee for the privilege.  And this can obviously be done in a day, so now it's all looking like a scam.  Then I go to the website to book an appointment for this, and my type of visa is the one type not listed on the drop down menu. This is just not going to be a fun process.  

It seems that no matter which country I live in, dealing with governments is frustrating and expensive.  I'm not saying Guy Fawkes should have done what he did . . . but I understand.

What Mama taught me (or how I can blatantly steal ideas from Abby Schiavello)

There are a hundred different things I love about and have learned from my mother.  Here are a few, in no particular order.

Never walk out the door without telling your family you love them. 

We are of German ancestry, so we are feisty.  We will fight sometimes.  But that doesn't mean we don't love each other.  And it's important to remind each other of that. One of the most important things we need when growing up is a certainty that we are loved.  Tommy and I never doubted that for a second.  

Call your mother.

Hell hath no fury like a mother that hasn't heard from her son.  But seriously, what does it cost you to call your mother?  Mom loves me, and she worries about me.  It doesn't matter that I am just driving from Pittsburgh to Annapolis.  Mom likes knowing I haven't been attacked by Godzilla on the way.

Everyone has a right to vent.  But stop whining.

There's an important distinction here.  Whatever you are feeling, put it into words.  Get it out of your system.  It's the only way to deal with it.  But as soon as I repeated myself, mom put a stop to it.  As soon as you complain a second time about the same thing without having done anything about it, it becomes whining.  And mom has no patience for whining.

Everyone needs a vacation.

For mom, vacation means taking off her watch, plopping down on a beach all day with a book, and eating at some point.  She worked very hard all year, and she rewarded herself by recharging her batteries for a week or two in the summer. I have never forgotten how necessary that is.

Chocolate doesn't solve everything, but it's a good place to start.

Mama loves chocolate.  She made me love chocolate.  But she likes the dark stuff.  I will stick with milk, thank you.  Mama used to have me sort through my Halloween candy and give her all the Tootsie Rolls.  Casino rules, I guess. A certain percentage goes to the house.

The Steelers are important.

It's not like a young man needs to be reminded of this, but the point was emphasized when I was 11 and the Steelers went into overtime in the playoffs against the Oilers.  It was way past bed time, but it was the Stillers! And Gary Anderson was on fire! It was totally okay to stay up late for that.

Never feel bad about spending money on your food, your shoes, or your bed.

Everything else is negotiable.  Budgeting is very tough, but keep your priorities.  You have to eat everyday, you are on your feet everyday, and you sleep a quarter of your life.  

It is important to laugh

And my mother laughs like a hyena. I got my loud and boisterous laugh from her.  Not everyone gets my mother's sense of humor.  Brett Karlik certainly didn't.  When he was sitting in my mother's chair and not responding to her look of "get up, punk," she just sat on him.  It freaked him out a bit.  Mom said to me later, "that boy needs to lighten up."  

If you are good to my son, I will be good to you

This goes for both mom and dad.  They have always been great to my friends.  They love anyone that is good to me, and they are not afraid to show it, even when I'm not around.  Many of my friends ask how my parents are doing.  At least the good ones.

Blunt honesty is the way to go

I don't ask a question to which I do not want an answer.  And I answer questions directly, whenever it's not imprudent to do so.  I got used to it, because beating around the bush just wasn't possible with my mother.  Waste of time.  Don't even think about lying to her.  It's like shooting a Grizzly bear with a .22.  It's not going to work, and it'll only piss her off.  

Feminism is a good thing.

A lot of people use that like it's a dirty word, but I always grew up with a very positive view of it.  Mama is a strong, independent woman that lives exactly how she wants to live.  She handled all the bills because she was better at it than Dad. She took off work for several months when Tommy and I were born, not because she felt it was her duty, but because Dad made more money.  She raised me to be a gentleman, not because of any gender expectations, but because it's the kind thing to do.  She defined, and continues to define, her own life.  That is feminism to me.  

Don't put more emphasis on the wedding than the marriage

I haven't had to put this particular piece of advice to work yet, but I can't help but be impressed by my mom and dad's 44 year marriage.  They are very different people today than they were back then, and yet they still share their lives.  Mom reminds me that you don't just say "I do" at the wedding, and then you're done. You have to say "I do" every day.  You have to choose to be with each other again as you both grow into different people.  Good advice for relationships and for friendships, I think.

Food is important

My mother is a good cook.  She would sometimes say, "Everyone dies of something.  I'll be damned if it will be hunger."  She made chicken noodle soup from scratch every time I was sick.  She makes special holiday cookies called Christmas hermits.  They are famous amongst those that have tried them.  Her Thanksgiving dinners are legendary.  She even made me a pumpkin pie and mailed it to me in England.  Did your mother do that?  No, I didn't think so.  I win.

I love you, Mom.